HE & I

by Kyla Ferrier

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about

Hopeful-melancholic rumination, concurrently base and astral.

credits

released May 12, 2016

Music and lyrics by Kyla Ferrier.



Kyla Ferrier produced "Come Back" "Act Like Magnets" "I Hate the End" "Legacy, Effect, and Cause" "Downtown Walking" "Am I Toast in this Coat?" "Dust"

Jordan Klassen produced "Is This?" "Home Tree" "Gold in Crops in Flames"

Julie Casselman produced "Maria"




Mastering by Brock McFarlane

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Track Name: Come Back
How long, forever, how long?
How long, forever, how long?

Come back, and I won't die.
Come back, and I won't die.

How long, forever, how long?
How long, forever, how long?

Come back, and I won't die.
Come back, and I won't-
Track Name: Act Like Magnets
Magnets turning we were drawn to hold
Fragments wanting peace in something whole
Grabbing, grasp for something soul
Try to make a moving magnets home

Particles in places no one sees
Articles of apathetic means
Tasking you to guard the pain in me
Asking sideways questions honestly

Small attempts to charge our common room
Incandescence running off of fumes
Melancholy admissions of truth
I am the sad confessor of our doom and gloom

And so I force and force and force to make it right
Touch and touch and touching every night
Packing tape my four limbs to curb flight
Act like I'm a thing I'm not with all my might

Act like I'm a thing I'm not with all my might

Bend my intuition over, take it rough
Muzzle all my feelings, play it tough
What amount of knowing is ever enough

I have to, I have to, I have to, I have to

I believed the words you said
As if written up above
You want me in your bed
But you don't want me in your love

Don't believe the words I said
I do not know what love means
When I held you in your bed
Was I only loving me?
Track Name: I Hate the End
How do we end
You are my friend
Now we are, now
We are done

I hate the end
Goodbye best friend
Goodbye the
Goodbye the one

My lips go dumb
My limbs go numb
My stomach falls

My stomach falls
My stomach falls

Cannot fix us, love
Tried to fit you like a glove
You can't wear me. I'm too worn
I can't share me anymore

Cannot fix us, love
Tried to fit you like a glove
You can't wear me. I'm too worn
I can't share me anymore

How do we start
To fall apart
I have to, I have to
Track Name: Is This?
Is this it? It’s not what I expected.
Or is it a trick? My veins are thick with red.
My veins are thick with red.

Tick tock tick four. Clock this talk more.

This talk this talk. This talk this talk. 



How can one know? How can one know?

Or is there a both? 
I stand up and hope, and watch.

I stand up eyes closed, and wait.



This talk this talk this talk this talk.

This talk this talk this talk this talk.



Are you in this? Are you inside?

Are we in this? Are we inside something?

Are you in this? Are you inside?

Are we in this? Are we inside something?



Are we inside something? / This talk, this talk.

Are we inside something? / This talk, this talk.

Are we inside? / This talk this talk

Are we inside? / This talk this talk.

Are we inside something?
Track Name: Legacy, Effect, and Cause
Lonely clutching rotting pit
Body of work jammed with woe
Eating me up bit by bit.
I care, I care, I know

I can't extract my soul from flesh
Feeling in capillaries, feeling as I intermesh

Corporeal marks leave spirit creases
Bent dense emptiness, grow closer
Compact pieces

Grieving denouements, a dying song
I've loved you for too long

I've loved you for too long
I've loved you for too long
I've loved you for too long

Pleading pulse out of my chest
My being screaming through the bars
I'll never get free from the mess of
Legacy, effect, and cause

I have reason. I am free.
Now no one can control me.
I'm so liberated in my cave.
God damn intellectually sane.

I am not bad
I am not bad
I am not bad
Am I still bad?
Am I still bad?
Am I still bad?

Pleading pulse out of my chest
My being screaming through the bars
I'll never get free from the mess of
Legacy, effect, and cause

I have reason. I am free.
Now no one can control me.
I'm so liberated in my cave.
God damn intellectually brave..

Bleeding waltz inside a cage
I'm backwards. I'm becoming walls
I am not free, I am not brave
I'm isolated pride and falls

I've loved you for too long
I've loved you for too long
I've loved you for too long
I've loved you for too long
Track Name: Downtown Walking
Downtown walking, crying
Walk cry
Downtown wonder, trying
One more try

Stop sign stopping
Red and resolute
Amber slowing
Slow or
Speed on through to your

Heartbreak walk away
Heartbreak walk away
Heartbreak walk away
Heartbreak walk away

Manmade skylight
High light overhead
Manmade sidewalk
Night time
Shoes
Led

Green light going
Green light going
Green light going
Walk this way
Track Name: Am I Toast in this Coat?
Cows and corn in dreams and day
I want THE LORD to go away sometimes
Blasphemy and crying shame
I feed the full, I rob the lame sometimes

Screaming sorrow while I drive
Uproot secrets in the briar. I'm fine
Melancholy fall to bed
Sometimes my heart, always always my head

What is a mantle?
Weight of earth on shoulders
Will I die?
Dressed down in scandal
Scarcely adequate
So I Imbibe

Kings on kings and hoards and hoards
Of subjects going overboard. I'm scared
Drunk on fire and feeling in the blood
Power in the there behind the flood

What is a mantle?
Weight of earth on shoulders
Will I die?
Dressed down in scandal
Scarcely adequate
So I Imbibe

I wrap my words around you like a coat
I wrap my arms around you like a home
I wrap my words around you like colours
I wrap my arms around you like mothers

I wrap my words around you like a coat
I wrap my arms around you like a home
I wrap my words around you like colours
I wrap my arms around you like mothers
Track Name: Home Tree
I put you under the home tree, box above roots
With stars all around, and stars below
Waterfalls fall from boughs
Down centre, statue, ebony
Feeding the underground

You contemplate like a shepherd
I love you like a sheep
You contemplate like a shepherd
I love you like a sheep

I put me under the home tree, tethered and tired
Desperate and wired on hope
Many leaves all fall down
Covered, buried, sinking
Into the underground

Drowning in the starlight
Just shut-up in the dirt
Drowning in the starlight
Just shut-up in the dirt
Track Name: Maria
All my time spent with Maria
All the things I wish I didn't do
And I only wanna see ya
In everything, in every point of view

I met someone who's with me
But my passion's dying on the spot
And I met someone who's far
We have a bond, but I'm not what he wants

Strip the layers of desire that went haywire with a brush
When I painted murals on the walls I should have tried to crush
All the energy of action I devoted to cement
All the roads and all the buildings couldn't care less if I left

All my time with Maria walking through the afternoon
7 nights, then Hot daytimes, then the loss of someone good
Fifty-two numbers, faces of our quality and care
Still we do not hear the same sounds, and the loving isn't fair

All my time with Maria- can I see ya through the haze
In a valley, hold my hand for more than just a phase
Holy words fall off eardrums onto floorboards in my room
I do not hear you calling and I do not feel your truth

All my time spent with Maria
All the things I wish I didn't do
And I only wanna see ya
In everything, In every point of view

I met someone who's with me
But my passion's dying on the spot
And I met someone who's far
We have a bond, but I'm not what he wants

All my time spent with Maria
All the things I wish I didn't do
And I only wanna see ya
In everything, In every point of view

Guess it takes some bricks to get there
Then it takes some breaking down again
Let the place fall down and let bare
That it never wanted to be friends
Track Name: Dust
Dust in the air, I'm here
Dust in the air, I'm here

A colander sky, lifting, sifting up
May all the fine things rise

Dust in the air, I'm here
Dust in the air, I'm here

A colander sky, lifting, sifting up
May all the fine things rise
Track Name: Gold in Crops in Flames
We were not for abiding
He and I
Not for held involvement
But I tried

Which him do I mean this time?
Where will I go after time?

Make me gold in hot hot fires of ache
Make me gold in hot hot fires of ache

Us will not ever happen
Cue facade
Not here for soulmate getting
O my God

Which hymn do I sing this time?
When will I matchpoint with time?

Make me gold in hot hot fires of ache
Make me gold in hot hot fires of ache
Make me gold in hot hot fires of ache
Make me gold in hot hot fires of ache

Your blacksmith paw
The Gentle Big Grand Hand
A farmer furnace artist godhead man
A thirty-seven piece new music band
I want to be in crops in flames a fan

Your blacksmith paw
The Gentle Big Grand Hand
A farmer furnace artist godhead man
A thirty-seven piece new music band
I want to be in crops in flames a fan

Your blacksmith paw
The Gentle Big Grand Hand
A farmer furnace artist godhead man
A thirty-seven piece new music band
I want to be in crops in flames a fan